Our faith is not really tested until God asks us to bear what seems unbearable, to do what seems unreasonable, and to expect what seems impossible.
Last week our pastor preached on Genesis 22, the account of God asking Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac. The quote above was mentioned in the sermon, and I also noted the challenging application that when God tests us, He is not punishing us or trying to tempt us to sin. He is giving us a chance to trust Him where maybe we failed to trust Him before, and He will provide for us and keep His covenant with us.
The sermon was well-timed for us, since we had just found out the beginning of a problem with our house that has become a big test of our faith. We’re still gathering information and professional estimates, but the more we learn, the worse things sound: more extensive, more complicated, more expensive. At this point, the problems seem staggering, and well beyond what we are equipped to handle.
I struggled as we learned more about the extent of the damage. Didn’t we just come through years of financial struggle? Weren’t we just getting back on our feet? Haven’t we earned a rest after some difficult health problems this year? I have so much to do – do I really need this added stress?
God wants my heart, not my words. Do I really trust that He is sovereign in all situations, and that He plans good for me? Do I trust Him for provision? For justice?
I’m praying that God would give us wisdom as we try to navigate this disaster, and also that God would increase my faith and trust in Him. I’m also grateful that God hears my prayers when I’m stressed and exhausted and discouraged. On our own strength and wisdom we can’t handle this, but God can.
I apologize if I owe you an email or haven’t returned your call, or if I spaced on something I was supposed to do. Nearly all of the balls I normally juggle got dropped last week, and they may have to roll around the floor for a few weeks (or, gulp, months) while this gets sorted out. Fortunately I have some posts in the queue so A Spirited Mind will keep calm and carry on even if its author is struggling to do the same! In the meantime, we would appreciate your prayers for us.